Pearl's Paradise

"Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled teams yearning to breath free…"

June 30, 2010
by Steve Pearl

The “Hugely” Important Issue of the Day

(ALERT:  What follows is intentional overuse of big words.  Get your dictionary ready, friends.)

I sincerely doubt that anyone will ever haul me into court accusing me of pitch-perfect application of the English language. I did my undergraduate work in Sociology, not English.  I hold no illusion that I will one day become the next internationally renown author of the "Great American Novel."

Writing long-winded, excruciatingly detailed, ponderously boring reports comes naturally to me.  Debate is innate.  But lilting, rightly crafted prose?  That, as I have been told, is a real struggle for a gasbag the likes of me.  (Or is it "I"?)

Was I ever a credible purveyor of the Queen's English in daily life?  

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June 8, 2010
by Steve Pearl

Ballmer the Emperor Has No Clothes… Or Clue

Steve Ballmer, the CEO of Microsoft and heir to the Bill Gates' Windows legacy, is a pretty wealthy guy.  Ballmer's earnings could probably do a decent job of taking a chunk out of the national debt if he really wanted to.

So you would be forgiven for thinking that all his accumulated wealth meant that old Stevie Boy was a really, really smart guy.  And he might in fact be a smart guy. 

He just didn't sound very smart when he whined on petulantly last week about the irrelevance of the Apple iPad.  As you'll see in a moment, Ballmer's characterization of the iPad pretty much screamed, "I'm the one wearing the clothes, I tell you!"

Perhaps you've heard about the iPad?  It's that slick new piece of hardware that everyone wants and that places like Best Buy just can't keep in stock.

Oh yeah…  I almost forgot. 

Microsoft had nothing to do with the iPad's flaming success.

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June 7, 2010
by Steve Pearl

Before I Dumped facebook, I Paused…

As promised, I dumped facebook first thing Monday morning.  Before I did, though, I paused.  I went back and gave a long, hard look at the list of "friends" I had accumulated during my time on facebook.  The sad truth is that with very, very few exceptions I will miss being a part of that rich social network.

But there are exceptions.  No, I won't "out" people here, running around like some petulant child shouting, "You're not my friend!"  I will, however, share a confession that might shock some of you.  You might find yourself in the same boat and be as afraid to admit the truth as was I.

Merely being on facebook made me feel a degree of subtle peer pressure with that whole "friend" thing.  I felt almost compelled to accept some folks as "friends" even though I really didn't know them well enough to call them "friends" in the classic sense.  I mean…  It's not like I ever chowed down over beef barbecue and corn on the cob with them, you know what I mean?

That's my problem with facebook.

Who is a "friend," really?

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June 7, 2010
by Steve Pearl

Worst Kept Secret Confirmed: New iPhone4 Dropping June 24

Gizmodo popped the story a little prematurely when it bought that errant iPhone prototype in late April, but that didn't stop Steve-O (Jobs, that is) from announcing a barrage of other, previously-unheard, unseen features shipping concurrent with the next-gen iPhone.  Apple's WWDC keynote today was vintage Jobs, including signature black turtleneck and right down to the "One more thing…", firing salvo after salvo across the bow of both RIM's Blackberry and Google's Android platforms.  Microsoft's Windows Mobile looked more like an afterthought than a bona fide competitor the way Jobs presented the event. 

Plus, news that Android's market share has gone from 0 to 9% in just over a year apparently got lost on Steve-O.  Or he just chose to avoid it like the master spin-meister he is.  Either way, the grand and glorious "Oz" of the technology world managed to altogether duck the topic of Android's assault on iPhone dominance.

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June 6, 2010
by Steve Pearl

Why I am Deactivating my Facebook Account

Some things in life just aren't as "free" as they seem at first glance.

Take facebook for example.  It may not cost much in terms of cold, hard cash but it can certainly carry a hefty cost in terms of heartache.

Last night I personally experienced the costly price of facebook as I viewed a posting on my daughter's facebook page.  My jaw dropped.  What I read was one "friend's" response to my daughter's innocent "Happy Birthday" posting for yet another friend.  The words seared into my eyes, giving this doting father a sucker punch to the gut.  I won't do the posting the dignity of a full airing here at "Pearl's Paradise."  Suffice it to say the word "whore" found its way onto my daughter's facebook "wall."

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